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Monday 27 November 2017

Do You Believe in Fate?

There are various school of thoughts when it comes to fate, those who believe entirely in fate, entirely in free will or a mixture of fate and free will.

For people who believe entirely in fate, they might be of the view that there is nothing they can or need to do to change their "destiny". In other words, they get something for nothing. Take relationships for example.

If it's fated that they will be in a relationship, they will be in a relationship. The man/woman/other will just appear in their lives. They don't have to change anything about themselves to "attract" a relationship. They don't have to do anything to get into a relationship.

If it's fated that a relationship will end, it will end. There's nothing they can do to salvage the relationship. The expiration date of a relationship lies in the hands of heavens.

If it's fated that they are in an abusive relationship. That is their fate. There's nothing they can do to get out of it.

If it's fated that they are in a relationship with someone who truly loves them for who they are, they can just continue to be "themselves". They don't have to adjust any single thing about themselves and the relationship will go from strength to strength.

I'm sure it's just me. But my view of fate is that I have a hand in it. I participate in life and am not just a mere puppet of someone/thing. Take relationships for example.

I believe that I meet someone by engaging in activities that connects me to potential partners. No one will appear from nowhere if I spend most time alone after work.

I believe that I can do something e.g. adjust my behaviour or thoughts to improve or fine-tune a relationship. A relationship goes through ups and downs. How we actively manage the troughs in the relationship are essential to its survival and success.

I believe that I can get out of an abusive relationship if I choose to. 

I believe that I most probably need to adjust myself when I'm living with someone. Compromise of some sort is required. After all, a relationship is a partnership. I cannot expect my partner to agree with every single agenda and desire of mine. 

If you haven't already guessed, I'm taking the middle ground when it comes to fate. Fate exists but I am involved in shaping it. For instance, if I'm destined to win the lottery, I have to first buy a lottery ticket. Those who believe entirely in fate may believe that they don't even have to a lottery ticket to win it. They can find a winning ticket on the floor.